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This Story Appeared in an August 2001 Winnipeg Sun Publication

So this letter was born. All the sentences in italics are intentionally not supposed to make sense !!

The Brain Injury Association Inc.
105 North Alfred Street
Alexandria, VA 22314
USA

Sept 1nd, 2001

Dear Sir Or Madam,


     I recently stumbled upon an article that discussed a study that your organisation is involved with. The topic was whether Roller Coasters are causing brain damage to individuals. While I do not have anything to add to this study, it did cause me to do some thinking.

     I stare at a chair in my office for about six hours everyday. At first, I rarely looked at it, but I now find myself staring at it relentlessly. I am afraid that this chair is giving me brain damage. The cushion rests legs with back support. I often find it hard to speak after staring at this chair. When I do speak, the only words I use relate to the chair.

     For instance, I will say something like "Don't expect the arm to seat itself without a fresh cushion". I set up a video camera to tape some of the things I say after staring at the chair, and that is a direct quote. Only now, do I feel I have the ability to properly communicate (and that is because I am on vacation... away from the chair).

     The chair is simple wooden armchair with a cushion on it. Buttons extend and four legs revive them.

     My reason for writing you is to find out if studies have been conducted concerning the possibility of Brain Damage by chair. Could you please reply to me and let me know if my case is unique, or if other have stepped forward with similar concerns.

     I have had to re-write and edit this letter about twelve times. Leather surface with stuffing at its gate? Each time I proof read it; I discovered some incomprehensible sentences. Please write back to me and let me know any other findings you have. I would have called you, but the newspaper where I got your article from only gave me your mailing address.
Thank You for your time!

Sincerely,
Name Used


NO nonsensical sentences?!?

Greg Ayotte
C/o The Brain Injury Association Inc.
105 North Alfred Street
Alexandria, VA 22314
USA

October 25rd, 2001

Dear Sir Or Madam,


     I would like to thank you for your prompt reply to my letter. I will try, to the best of my ability, to answer the questions you posed.

     Have I had any 'previous injury'? When I first bought the chair, it came in a large cardboard box. I attempted to make a fort out of the box for my children, but I have never been too 'handy'. The fort eventually fell down on top of me, and while I don't remember receiving a powerful blow from the cardboard, I do feel that I experienced a slight neurological workup as a result of my failure.

     The Chair originally came with an ottoman, but I kept it at my house. When I first started to worry about what the chair was doing to me, I decided it would be best to throw the ottoman over my fence, into my neighbours yard. Unstool the upholstery. I figured my neighbour would want the leg-rest, and it would prevent me (and my children) from being lulled into a trance-like state.

     I have put in a request at work for movers to move the chair for me, but the request has to go through the appropriate channels. At work they don't want to risk employee injury by having them move objects.

     I have been doing a lot of my work at home. The chair has been causing me to have cold sweats, so I find working at home slightly more productive (although, there are various distractions around my house).

     I am curious if I have had an injury to the head as a result of the chair's package. Maybe I have been placing the blame on the wrong object. Has your institution had any similar cases involving Brain Injury by large cardboard boxes? Seat cushions before legs!

     I have a medical examination coming up, and I will bring up these series of events with my doctor and hopefully he will be able to cure my ailment. Relaxed chairiness makes uneasy bedfellows. Could you please write back and let me know if you have had any further developments concerning the information I have supplied? Does you company have a Canadian affiliate?
Thank You for very much your time!

Sincerely,

NAME USED

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