The Texas Zoo
Attn: Entertainment Director
110 Memorial Dr.,
Victoria, Texas 77902
May 10th, 2001
Dear Texas Zoo,
My name is NAME USED, and I am a specialist in the area of Animal Entertainment. I have been putting on entertainment for various zoo-housed animals for twelve years. My speciality is entertaining various monkey families, weasel families, and serpent families. My main goal is to alleviate any stress that the animals experience while in captivity.
I am currently scheduling my U.S.A. tour, and was wondering if you wish to obtain my services. I will provide all my own equipment (rain gear, wigs, and make-up) necessary for the shows.
Could you please write back to me and inform me on your current entertainment scheduling (and any open days). My charge varies, but I always negotiate to an affordable price (I do this for the love of Animal Entertainment).
Here is what people have said about my performances:
“I was dumbstruck by how much animals could be entertained ”
- Gene Harder, Canadian Zoological Gazette
“ If the Monkey’s had fully developed thumbs, they would have raised them both!”
- Stephen Sim, Crumbs Weekly
“Although the show was scripted, the best parts were improvised”
- Morley Walker Winnipeg Free Press
Your's Truly,
NAME USED
Fancy Pants Agency
THE REPLY IS CURRENTLY IN STORAGE IN CANADA
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